What do you think about your childhood? There are many psychological theories. We agree that people’s childhood experiences have an effect on their personality, thoughts, and feelings in adulthood. There is even a therapy model named “Trauma Model”. “Schema Therapy” This assumption is the basis of this assumption.
Let’s first look at the sentences/thoughts below before we get into this subject.
- “I don’t belong anywhere”
- “I am afraid to lose control.”
- “People can hurt you.”
- “I often feel different and excluded.”
- “There is no one that understands me.”
- “I will be finally alone again.”
- “I must always succeed.”
- “I prioritise the needs of others above my own.”
- “I let people control my life.”
- “I don’t have anything to love.”
- “People can harm me, so I have to be alert.”
Are some of these sentences familiar? Are you aware of similar phenomena? Thoughts run through your mind Do you ever feel like this from time-to-time? You can see how difficult, stressful, and anxiety-inducing it is. To achieve a goal, you must act in accordance with these thoughts? Such Our thoughts are what determine our outlook on life. This belief is so strong that we believe it in our actions. It doesn’t occur to us to doubt how true this idea is. These considerations should be viewed from the perspective of a Schema Therapy perspective?
Schemes: These are the stereotypes that a subject has about itself. They result from the experiences, moments and memories we had in childhood, which we reinforce with the Following years. Schemas are great for simplifying our lives and work well in theory. Some schemas are distorted and make it difficult to understand. Adult life requires that you adapt to your environment. The sentences in the above paragraphs are reflections of our main schemas. Our beliefs are triggered by an event. When this happens, our thoughts about the subject become visible in all areas. We feel like our thoughts are enslaving us at these times. It happens to everyone. Our thoughts seem to control our behavior, emotions, and lives. These beliefs can cause discord for some people. It is a distortion of reality. It can cause pain and suffering. This is when we believe we are dealing with a psychological issue.
So far I’ve mentioned that beliefs can limit and force us to live in certain ways. Our views Inner child Most likely lie Based on these beliefs. Now, I want back to my childhood to see the roots of these beliefs.
Our Inner Children: From Childhood to Adulthood
Hurt Your Child
Every child has basic childhood needs. Love, commitment, care, attention, security, praise, and empathy are just a few of them… We feel hurt when our parents do not meet these needs. We also experience sadness, anxiety, loneliness. The lack of love for our inner child is a sign of our inner hurt child Our relationships are affected Throughout our adult lives. Trust issues, fear of abandonment and problems with commitment are all possible.
Angry Boy
Another scenarioOur thoughts, feelings, and existence were not accepted, and our need to be free was not fulfilled in childhood. We feel angry in such situations. An angry child in us project his inner anger outside. We all experience anger, resentment and irritability.
Impulsive child
Let’s say our parents don’t teach us the social rules and boundaries. The impulsive child takes over. We want what is best for us right away. We are prone to arbitrary behavior. We don’t understand the needs of others, because we were not taught. This situation can lead to self-control problems as an adult. Sometimes we have trouble understanding the limits of others or ourselves.
Happy child
However, sometimes things do not always go as planned. Our parents are able to meet our needs and provide love and support, and we feel happy and fulfilled. When we grow up, the happy child in us will continue to be happy. A happy child shows the ability when he grows up. Solve the problem He attempts to deal with any difficulties he comes across and continues his life, partially without difficulty.
Our adult lives reflect our childhood experiences.
The hurt child A child whose family does not provide the love he needs, grows up and becomes afraid of being alone. Fearful of being alone, he attempts to get help. Maintain a good relationship That hurts him and he doesn’t enjoy it.
An Anger child Growing up in a home His presence is not valued and he becomes a perfectionist. He should be the best at all his exams and never make mistakes in life. Perhaps he believed this would prove his existence.
The Impulsive childThe child of neglectful, poorly-guided parents, he doesn’t respect the rules as a child, puts himself first, and considers himself to be a priority. They are self-centered, selfish, self-righteous and self-centered. There are many examples of this behavior in our lives and the lives of those around.
How is your inner child doing? Is she hurting? Angry? Are you undisciplined? Is she happy? Do you believe your inner child still has a need that is not being met? Is there a need that hasn’t been met?
What would you say to your inner child if you closed your eyes? You might want to hug him, pat his head, or say a few words of encouragement to make him happy.