Sexuality is a natural part of human life. Our sexual life plays a role in meeting our physical, spiritual, and social needs. Our thoughts and feelings about our sexual life affect us individually and in terms of relationships. If the person or the partner is experiencing sexual problems, this is challenging for both parties.
The frequency, severity, and content of sexual problems are influential in determining whether the problem is a clinical problem. If you think that you or your partner is having issues sexually, I suggest you look at my article.
In this article, I would like to suggest an application in the treatment procedures for many sexual problems. It is evident that the pain experienced is a demoralizing and undesirable situation for both people. Especially if we have wrong beliefs about sexuality from the past, both people can have separate anxieties and worries. If you are experiencing similar situations, prepare a pen and paper! People focus only on pleasure and pleasure, without seeing sexuality as sexual intercourse and without performance anxiety.
Sensate Focus Exercise
Sexual activity for the person; anxiety, stress, performance anxiety, reluctance, pain, and fears of failure. People with sexual problems often have anxious thoughts about sex. When this is the case, there is no attractive and relaxing aspect of sexual activities for the person. This application aims to ensure that the person enjoys and relaxes from sexual activities such as kissing, caressing, and touching without worrying about sexual intercourse. The main logic of the exercise is elementary: Focus on the emotional aspects of sexuality rather than sexual intercourse.
Exercise has been a therapeutic intervention for sexual problems since its development. William Masters and Virginia Johnson designed the sensory focus exercise in the 1970s. Master and Johnson aimed to increase couples’ skills, such as relaxation, communication, bonding, and physical effect with sensory focus exercise. If you are ready, write down the following application steps on your paper.
Step 1: Creating the ideal environment
First, choose a place where you and your partner can feel comfortable. Sex therapists suggest they choose a different area, considering that bad experiences in the bedroom can affect people. If the bedroom reminds you of negative feelings, you can choose a different location. Pay attention to the temperature of the environment you select and the dimness of the light, and be able to create a private space. At this stage, you can also benefit from candles and relaxing music to create the ideal atmosphere. Finally, ensure that neither your partner nor you are on an anxious or unpleasant day. Make sure that you both are tolerant and accommodating to each other.
Step 2: Starting with small steps
Couples can do all sexual activities except sexual intercourse as long as the other party wishes. What and how much emotional focus exercise will involve depends entirely on the partners. However, the general recommendation is to start the application with small touches. It is recommended to begin by touching areas such as hands, feet, and hair rather than erotic regions.
One of the essential functions of the application is to communicate. Therefore, give him feedback if your partner touches you during the application. Express what you like and what you don’t like. If you’re the one touching, ask your partner for feedback. Try to discover spots that you both enjoy. You can also think of this practice as exploring sensory pleasure.
Step 3: Ensuring equality
Continue the application for at least 15-20 minutes. Apply alternately if possible. Allocating equal time to both partners is essential for establishing a bond. It plays a vital role in solving sexual problems by falling over the practices and repeating them frequently. You can gradually increase the content of the exercises. I recommend that you make this application whenever you have the opportunity. VL
The benefits of sensory focus exercise
Before concluding the article, I would like to talk about the benefits that we expect exercise to provide to people. I think it can help people who are undecided about whether or not to do the exercise.
As a result of the frequent practice of the exercise:
- Partners become aware of their feelings.
- Partners focus on their own need for pleasure and do not worry about the other.
- It is ensured that the sensory and sexual needs are communicated to the other party.
- Touching, kissing, and caressing are enjoyed without performance anxiety.
- There is an expansion in the repertoire of sexual behavior. Discoveries are made.
- It is realized that the pleasure of foreplay and touching is an element of fun in itself rather than the path to the result.
- Positive relationship experience is gained.
- Sexual desire increases.